Bold Avenger

Moving

2011-04-26T15:20:00.001-04:00

For whatever reason I have decided to try posting things again. But not here.

Here.

Thank you!

Where am I?

2008-09-07T15:22:00.003-04:00

Ok. So. I don't seem to update this site anymore. It was never very good anyway.

I put the challenge to you.

If I get 2 comments to this post within the next 7 days, I'll put more effort into updating this site. If not, I delete it.

Why waste bandwidth, right?

Yours,

It has been a long time

2008-03-29T01:26:00.003-04:00

Back in 1987 I was introduced to The Smiths by my best friend Jeff. I was never bright enough to get all of Morrissey's references anymore than I was able to get all of Neil Gaiman's references once Sandman came out in '89. There were two tapes that really changed my view on music back then and they both came from Jeff (as most things seem to have, at the time): the first Violent Femmes tape and "The Queen Is Dead" by The Smiths. Having grown up listening to the radio, which is not much better some 20 years later, I just didn't know there was other music out there. I just didn't know. 120 Minutes on MTV soon became my weekly does of what was then, and still is, true alternative music (save your arguments, lone reader, I'll debate this another time. I'm waxing melancholy here) and I loved every minute of it. If you've read recently you have seen what was probably the most eye-opening video/song for me by XTC, but "The Queen Is Dead" in particular opened my mind up to music and lyrics that maybe I didn't fully understand, but I could appreciate for their beauty.

I love music still, but those mind-expanding songs and experiences seem long gone.

I had to return sometime, right?

2008-03-17T23:38:00.004-04:00

Dear reader (why kid myself),

How have you been? It's been so long since I posted, you must have been worried for my safety. Fear not, dear one. I am, and have been, fine. I am what you might call "lazy". I truly enjoy writing this site, I just never seem to do it. And then there's the fact that not even my wife reads it. She said that when I post videos that they're too long, so she never watches them. But you do, don't you friend? I know you do and I love you more than 10,000 rainbows for it. Should I post one for you now? No? You want to hear more about my childhood? All in good time, little one. For now, enjoy this nugget. It brought me much joy a long time ago and can still bring a wee sly smile to my punim.

Happy Easter!

Tell me all of your Christmas wishes!

2007-12-25T11:08:00.000-05:00

One of the funniest things.

2007-12-04T14:37:00.001-05:00

I just finished reading Steve Martin's new memoir about his time as a stand up comedian called "Born Standing Up". It was a fantastic read and while it didn't mention it by name it did remind me about one of my favorite things from my childhood.

BTW, on the subject of Steve Martin, is it ok that I now reveal to the world the crush I had on Bernadette Peters? Thank you. It feels good to share.

Jangle jangle

2007-11-29T15:02:00.000-05:00

When I first heard the song, I thought the chick was singing. I love the song but I wonder what his voice will sound like once his sack drops.

Lord, help the Mister...

2007-11-27T08:44:00.000-05:00

One of my favorite movies of all time. And yet, it still pains me when the script takes it's dramatic turn. It's so silly of a thing to get wrong and to take so harshly.

The way it should be.

2007-11-14T23:32:00.000-05:00

Yeah, let's see you try to play the piano sideways. Just amazing.

It may be a bit long, but take the time out your day to enjoy it. Thanks.

What Was Tony Listening To? (17 year edition, pt. 2)

2007-11-14T01:12:00.000-05:00

I got this cassette (yeah, you read right. I said I was old. Get off my lawn.) from my friend Erica for Christmas of...I want to say 1989. That was cool. So is Erica.

I heard later that Prince had advised the ladies that the video would have done better if they hadn't looked so...relaxed, I guess. He suggested sexy outfits and shit. I think they looked fine. Not that they need me to say anything nice about them. They now to the music for "Heroes". My guess, they're doing fine.

I do wonder...how do you play a piano filled with water? Hell, listen to the song. Do you hear any piano? Me neither.

What Was Tony Listening To? (17 year edition)

2007-11-14T01:08:00.000-05:00

God, I miss Mary's Danish. I saw them live at Bogart's in Cincy (thanks to a very cool young lady I knew) back on December 1, 1992. I met Julie and Wag from the band after the show. Autographs and chat. I am old.

What Was Tony Listening To? (10 year edition)

2007-11-14T01:04:00.000-05:00

One of the few songs by Lush I could actually understand. Most of their songs were so soft and, well, inaudible. This kicked.

I dare you!

2007-11-01T00:21:00.000-04:00

If you can watch this without:

1. Smiling.
2. Getting the goddamn song stuck in your head.

Then you are a better person than I. My hate boils up over you and your perfection.

Happy HalloPeeWeen

2007-10-31T00:50:00.000-04:00

Happy Halloween (slightly happier).

2007-10-31T00:48:00.001-04:00

Happy Halloween (slightly creepy).

2007-10-31T00:47:00.001-04:00

We must save out children from this filth (1982 edition) or Captain Obvious Strikes Again!

2007-10-11T19:35:00.000-04:00

So, loyal reader (why kid myself that there's more than one of you. I know it damn sure isn't my lovely bride because she told me that she never watches any videos I post because they're too long. Anyway...) as you have read earlier I have recently come to the realization of just how filthy "Little Red Corvette" is. Today, I found another stunning and blatant example of just how disgustingly filthy pop music truly is. Believe me when I warn you that this is NSFW.

Did you catch all that? As legend (or myth or Mr. Greenjeans) once explained the term "Rock and Roll" is an old phrase meaning sexual fornication. Ok, so Ms. Jett loves "Rock and Roll" and wants you to "put another dime in the jukebox, baby." Well, Ms. Jett, I believe I am now bright enough to understand what you mean (and I am no longer enamored with that lusty guitar riff at approx. 1:37 into the song (2:07 in the video) that I always thought sounded just like a motorcycle engine). Let's look at the facts. A juke box takes coins in a slot. A narrow slot. Do I have to spell it out to you, lone reader? Her cooch is the slot and his junk is the dime (is she implying a manly 10 inches?)! And, hold the phone...what's this? She's trying to get it on with an underage male of only 17 summers.

Filth, people! Filth.

(I will say one thing in the songs favor: it's just under 3 minutes. Songs are too fucking long anymore. Get in, get out and stop fucking wasting my time with your "art", you shitheads.)

(And, because YouTube has everything)(Even shit you never knew existed)(here, then, is the COLOR version of this disgustingly filthy song. Enjoy, you simple degenerate.)

As I dip my toe into unoriginal waters...

2007-09-19T20:17:00.000-04:00

As you have no doubt read earlier, I don't really care for terms like "nerd" or "geek" but for whatever reason I have assembled a small and ragged list for you of my top "Attractive Ladies of Nerddom"

Why do I do this to myself?

Captain Obvious is born!

2007-09-02T13:26:00.000-04:00

I am 35. I was 10 or 11 when I first received 1999 by Prince (on cassette, no less) for Christmas. Outside of hearing "fuck" in a song for the first time and becoming a groovy little Prince fan, I never thought much about the song Little Red Corvette. Until last week. I loaded up the car cd player and listened to his old stuff. While I listened to the song it dawned on me...like clouds parting from my sky...what he was actually singing about. Vagina. Not unlike Ring Of Fire (which according to Johnny Cash's first wife is about that very orifice), Little Red Corvette is about vagina, pussy, bajingo, hoo haa, etc.

Judge for yourself.

Okay, she parks her car sideways. Like maybe up and down. Get it, huh, huh? Next, vaginas, in a universal sense are "little" and to a certain degree (your color may vary) "red", yes? We all know the line about Trojans and what that means and yeah, maybe you can assume he's fucking this chick in an actual corvette (he is a small guy), but when she "drives" him to the place where her "horses run free", she's basically driving him to Jordachetown. And to think, I can remember Casey Kasem talking about songs with cars in the titles way back in 1982 during America's Top 40 instead of instructing this gentle, toe-headed young lad that this song was, in fact, filthy.

Just plain filthy.

Tony's questions about Star Wars

2007-09-02T13:14:00.000-04:00

So, I picked up the umpteenth version of Star Wars on dvd a few weeks back because Best Buy had the latest two-disk version that has both the fancified 1997 version and the original 1977 theatrical print for sale...cheap! When the newest 2 diskers came out I wasn't going to buy them all again after having bought the Trilogy when it came to dvd a couple years back (even though it bugged me that it was only the new, sluttier version), but at about 6 bucks, I couldn't pass up buying Star Wars again (it was the only one at that price). I am happy to see that the film looks it's age. The sound crackles a little and the picture isn't perfect and that, G.L., is absolutely fucking fine! Han shoots Greedo and Greedo never even fires a single shot! No garish Mos Eisly! Wonderful, I say!

While watching a bit today some questions came up that I'd never considered before. Any answers would be greatly appreciated.

1. Why does Leia need Ben in the first place? He didn't own a spaceship. He was old. All she needed to do was get her ass to the Rebel base, so why stop off for a visit?

2. When did they dry off from being in the garbage chute? Luke got soaked under water and comes out fresh as a daisy.

3. Why did Ben think that his death would help Luke in the long run? Lets forget G.L.'s bullshit quasi explanation in his last abortion of a Star Wars film about Jedi coming back, somehow, in ghostly form (which, by the way, is elaborated on in the novel - I only cracked open the end of the book just to see if anything made the ending any clearer - but it's still crap), but what does his death accomplish?

4. Why didn't the damn Death Star just blow up Yavin to get to the hidden Rebel base? It does blow up planets, dunnit?

My head hurts.

Sometimes, you have to let the man do the work.

2007-08-29T23:32:00.001-04:00

Beakman's World Rocks!!!

2007-08-23T16:25:00.000-04:00

I was introduced to this show in the early 90s and I always thought it was fantastic, original and fun. Then it disappeared and all I would see was that dipshit Bill Nye around everywhere teaching kids about science. Trust me, folks, that douche has absolutely nothing on Beakman's World. Beakman made learning way funner (yes, I meant to say it that way) than anything I was ever introduced to back in school (I found this with Schoolhouse Rock as well, but that's a subject for another time). If you have a few moments, please enjoy these samplings and check around your cable dial for Beakman's World. After having been off the air for a decade or so it has shown back up on not one but two of my cable stations. Every weekend I find two new eps. to enjoy (but be aware that TiVo doesn't always get the descriptions correct. Most of the time whatever it says the topic is, it isn't, so if you're seeing the same ep. listed twice you should record both because odds are they're different) and I've been recording them all. If only I knew how to record them to my computer and edit them into little chunks for posting on YouTube. I like to share.

The next clip is one I enjoy because a couple times on the show Paul Zaloom (Beakman) and Mark Ritts (Lester the rat) played these sports announcers and it's hilarious. If you watched the first one you will have noticed that the girl sidekick is different from clip to clip. The first one had Alanna Ubach as Josie and during those episodes Beakman was a little less manic than when he was joined by Senta Moses as Phoebe. I enjoy the less manic Beakman, but I take what I can get. And, yes, Lester is always terrific.

My last clip is one I had forgotten all about until I was searching for Beakman clips. It comes from some Bette Midler show called Mondo Beyond (which I have no memory of at all, even though I dig Bette) and it stars Paul Zaloom. This is where I'd first seen him (hell, it may have been the only place I'd seen him before Beakman) and when the clip started I was waiting for him to show up. Once he started his bit, I knew it all over again. Even before he did it I was chiming in with the "dokdokdokdokdok" Trust me, it's worth a gander. Enjoy, please.

Tony's Old School August - pt. 4

2007-08-21T22:07:00.001-04:00

Public Enemy. Flavor Flav is exactly what he called 911 back in the day. The group has been tarnished by his shenanigans and their impact is almost non-existent anymore. Where are the conscious rap acts? I mean, yeah, wearing the X hats back in the early 90s was goofy because it made Malcolm a product and I can't imagine him enjoying that fact, but Public Enemy had a message that kids today would be wise to listen to. But what do I know?

Tony's Old School August - pt. 3

2007-08-21T21:54:00.000-04:00

This was the first thing I'd ever heard by A Tribe Called Quest. High school. Late 80s. Not that I wish I could go back to high school or anything, but damn, I wish this type of rap had become dominant and not....well, sorry gangsta rap, but you honestly should have just been a fad. I call 'em like I see's 'em. Respect tho to Dr. Dre. It's nice to see Common get to the top spot on the charts even though I know absolutely none of his songs. (EDIT: I now own his new album mainly due to the track with Lily Allen on it. She fucking rocks!)

Forgive the ads on the start of this next one. I have to take what I can get from the YouTube Gods.

I am debating whether or not to include Scenario. I like it, but I don't find it typical of their work. It's a jam session with Leaders of the New School (read: Busta Rhymes' original group. He stole this song out from under everybody else) and it's a good video. Fuck it. Here ya go:

Tony's Old School August - pt. 2

2007-08-21T21:44:00.000-04:00

Yes, they had their own cartoon. Things like this happened back in the day. But honestly, would you want your kids to watch a cartoon by any of these shitfucker rap "artists" nowadays? Huh? Seriously folks, there is nothing wrong with rap being...wait for it...FUN. I'm not saying Jiggy this and Will Smith that (although we all know that Parents Just Don't Understand was the shit back in the day.). We know this as a fact, but we're talking Kid N Play here. House Party was a decent film. I recognize no sequels. Sorry. No Robin Harris, no House Party. Damn, I wish he was still alive.

As it was...back in the day.

Tony's Old School August - pt. 1

2007-08-21T21:29:00.001-04:00

Yeah, so August is almost over and I thought this up a month or so ago, but I just remembered it today. I want to focus on Old School rap. I've always liked rap, but it just makes me sad anymore. None of it is good. Hell, you know what I'm talking about...I don't need to spell it out for you (but I will if it will help). Trust me, I will NOT steer you wrong.

Here is the first of what I believe to be the best of the best from when rap was great. Please enjoy!

Eric B & Rakim were the first to really get sampling down correctly. They mined James Brown long before anyone else and they did it best. No one...and I mean this...NO ONE raps quite like Rakim. The track above gave the world the whole "Pump Up The Volume" dealy, but let us not think less of the for that. I'm sure they had nothing to do with it. Damn you Technotronic!

In a recent issue of Entertainment Weekly Don Cheadle said that his little kids knew ever word of this song. That fucking rocks, folks. Teach the youth, ya hear?

More from training

2007-08-09T11:36:00.000-04:00

I also got into a debate with one of my trainers last weekend about where this clip hails from. She said Sesame Street and I said The Electric Company.

One again, I was wrong. Damn this brain! I'm gonna poke it till it smartens up.

Doesn't take much to make me happy...

2007-08-06T17:41:00.002-04:00

Liopleurodon

2007-08-06T17:10:00.000-04:00

Over the weekend (Thurs thru Sunday, actually) I attended a seminar for work. It was very long. The thing that got me through was having a fellow attendee show me the following. I wish I knew how people find things like this. The world is too large of a place to not find nuggets of Genius like this. Enjoy or don't. Enjoy, damn you!

Me (A year-by-year assessment), pt. 2

2007-07-19T16:23:00.001-04:00

First grade. (cont. from here)

This was the only time in my life that I did not attend a public school. Apparently the decision to send me to a Catholic school for first grade is one of conjecture since the word from my extended family was that the teacher who taught First grade at the public school 3 blocks away from my house may have been the reason that one of my uncles stutters. I dunno how you actually prove something like that though. I, obviously, lived within walking distance of the school I would attend for 2nd thru 6th grades. I could see that damn place from my house and yet I went a couple of miles away to St. Roch Catholic School for the first grade. I was not then nor have I ever become a Catholic, so I will freely admit that the fact that I went there puzzled the bejesus out of me (Ha! I made a funny!!!)

I remember going in for the meeting with the principal to enroll in the school. My main contribution to that meeting was making the comment that if I added milk to the "chocolate" colored pants i would have to wear, I could make...wait for it...chocolate milk! My wit, even , then...rapier sharp, my friends.

I started out the year with one teacher (Mrs. Hagen) and ended it with a different teacher (Mrs. Hazen) and I have no idea why. I stayed in the same room with the same kids, but our teacher changed and yet the last name stayed almost the same.

The school (or rather the education) was decent I guess. I mainly remember the following:

I had a friend there named Tony Baskerville and he was probably the first guy friend I had. He was bigger than I was (which isn't saying anything really because I was always a tiny little shit) and I mainly remember him because of something we called the Baskerville Express. I will now freely admit to being a pussy for the majority of my life. In first grade we had a small yard and some concrete for recess. There may have been a swing or two, but I do know that there was a slide. The slide. I loved and hated that thing. Going hand in hand with almost always being a pussy, I have always been scared of heights. Being a tiny little 5 or 6 year old meant that when I looked up at this gargantuan slide, I was terrified. Tony made the slide manageable because we would go down the slide together. He would be in front and I was in back and we went down the slide as if we were a train. (In my adulthood looking back, I find it hard not to place some sort of justifier here stating that the act was in no way homosexual, but believe me...it wasn't and my hang up at this moment has more to do with my age and experience with the world than it does with the actual experience) There was one day when we were on the slide that he somehow got away from me right from the start and being the pussy that I was, I made all of the kids behind me get off the ladder so that I could climb down from the slide. Indiana Jones I wasn't.

More later.

There are many things I do not know...

2007-07-19T16:16:00.000-04:00

but I believe that somewhere, in this small piece of video, lie all the secrets of the Universe.

You just have to love the internet (and The White Stripes).

2007-06-20T14:30:00.001-04:00

I find the second song to be much more enjoyable than the first, but give them credit for sounding so big with just two people.

0619cw
Uploaded by ME

Is it possible?

2007-06-04T15:20:00.001-04:00

Am I the only one who ever liked this band?

Last for the day?

2007-06-04T15:07:00.000-04:00

Just because right about now.....rap sucks!

Just enjoy being a junkie.

2007-06-04T14:57:00.000-04:00

I love 80s music. (Not all of it mind you because a certain New Jersey band should burn for eternity in the fires of Hell where they belong) I was a huge fan of MTVs 120 Minutes and I wish I had more tapes than I do of it in its prime. I have often wondered if a band back then would have cracked mainstream like Nirvana did, what would music be like today? I can name tons of bands to use as a jumping off point for this fantasy but I'm using the one seen here. I will grant you up front that the lead singer is not much to look at (and as we all know, that means everything, dunnit?) but holy shit.....the music. I have waxed on about this band before here. I'm not saying they're my favorite band ever, I'm just saying what I'm saying. Stop asking so many questions!

YouTube has me in it's clutches. Go! Get help!

2007-06-04T14:42:00.000-04:00

I really want to call this NerdRock, but I can't because I have never liked the word Nerd. Or Geek. I can't imagine when people like me started to identify with these words. Yeah, ok, you like science fiction and you maybe like comics or anime or whatever dings your dong, but people these words are not for us. Shitheads called me a nerd when I was a kid and I'll be damned if I'm gonna like being called a geek any better just because it has been re-appropriated by like-minded people. Maybe I over think this. I have it as a topic floating in my head for my podcast (if that ever sees the light of frikkin day), but in my warped mind I compare it to the N word. Some hate it and for others it's ok to use because they've taken it back from it's hateful past...or something like that. Yeah, I don't think so. I guess you can call yourself whatever you want, but letting other people or the media call you names based on your hobbies and interests is bullshit. Fuck, I never understood kids thinking I was smart when I was little because I wore glasses. I had bad eyes, you stupid fuckers, and that didn't make me smart anymore than it made me a nerd.

Enjoy the music.

Holy crap! Two in a row!!!

2007-06-04T14:14:00.001-04:00

To anyone of a certain age this will resonate with them like few other things can. To others, this will confound them and they will slink back to playing things like Halo or God of War or whatever other craptacular games these punk kids are playing now.

I mean, Christ Almighty, people. Give me something fun and entertaining to play. Like Combat on the Atari 2600. Or Dig Dug on the Commodore 64 (which, according to Wikipedia - so take it however you want - is the best-selling single personal computer model of all time. Take that Bill Gates! Stick that in your iPod and digitally manage its rights, Steve Jobs!) Hell, I'll take Hunt the Wumpus on my old TI 99/4A any day (yeah, I bought one off of eBay a while back for something like 14 bucks. I know, I rule.)

This was fun. Thank you. You're welcome.

It'll stunt your growth.

2007-06-04T14:07:00.000-04:00

One of the only reasons I ever went to a now-defunct movie theatre here in town was, besides the fact that they served halfway decent food and drinks, they used to run the following as a promo before each movie. They used the clip so long that it was of amazingly bad quality by the end of its life, but man, was it funny. Thanks to the joys of the internets, I present it to you now...in all of its mustachioed glory!

I suck and I am lame, but I sometimes find interesting things.

2007-05-11T18:00:00.000-04:00

Most of the time I go for long stretches without a post and then I'll post a bunch in a row. I don't know that that will happen today, but I wanted to post this as a thank you to the 4 people who read this.

I was shown this late last year by a former co-worker. It was one of the only good things she ever showed me.

Enjoy!

"Attention shoppers!"

2007-04-17T16:32:00.000-04:00

Villains in the movies are often the most interesting characters. They act out a side of humanity that we wish didn't exist, but deep inside we know that we might just have a slice of that inside us. That's not only where our fear of these characters lies, but also where our fascination lies as well. These characters illuminate the darker side of ourselves while giving us full warning that, without a good conscience to guide us, we may fall victim to these dark desires.

Laugh if you must (and do so at your own peril!), but respect must now be given to one of the most underrated movie villains of all time!

Willy, King of the stockboys!

Bow down to the might that is Willy! He is always watching you!

Even the most deadly of screen villains must have style. Behold, the dapper use of a red-trimmed smoking jacket accented ever so adroitly with a smart, yet toney ascot.

*Note that the sign of an elegant villain is one with his name embroidered on his jacket!
Click the pic for a better look-see.

What? You think all of this is crazy? A villain wouldn't pay attention to such things? Willy, my friends, disagrees.

"I'm not crazy, I just don't give a fuck!"

When it comes to out and out creepy visual dazzle, Willy is the King! Whether it's in the light or in the shadows, Willy commands not only the respect of his victims, but of the audience as well.

All I ask, dear reader, is that you give Willy a chance to work his way into that cold, dark spot you keep in your soul for favorite movie villains. Hannibal schmannibal. He can have his fava beans and chianti. Willy has an even better line. (Check it out right after Samantha asks him what he wants.)

Check out Willy in all of his glory in Night of the Comet!

Heroes schmeroes.

2007-04-16T11:58:00.000-04:00

Do I watch the tv show Heroes? Yes, but.....

Fuck Heroes!

"Save the cheerleader, save the world?"

Bullshit!

Some cheerleaders can take care of their own damn selves...

And, some can't, but they look up to those that can and wish they could.

Sorry, Heroes, but...try as you might,you cannot fuck with
Night Of The Comet!

"See, this is the problem with these things. Daddy would've gotten us Uzi's."
- Kelli Maroney as Samantha Belmont

The Good, The Bad, The Prom.

2007-04-16T10:15:00.000-04:00

So, the wife and I went to the prom this past Saturday. Yep, the prom. It was an "adult" prom held by a local radio station (and by "adult" it was far from something exciting like a fetish ball or the like, although it was co-sponsored by a local adults novelty/porn shop). The wife has wanted to go for the last couple of years, but she always seemed to be on call for her job. With call not being an issue anymore, we went full out for this thing. She bought a beautiful prom dress and I rented a dashing tuxedo (we forgot all about getting each other flowers, but eh, no big deal) and we were off to the races...well, ok, we were off to a local K of C at least.

I remember my proms very vividly. My proms were better than this prom in a couple of ways: decorations, importance, pictures. The decoration for this thing were a joke. At $25 per couple, I expected more than a balloon arch, two balloons per table and tons of signs for the radio station (odds are, geniuses, that if we knew about the prom, we know about your station. Don't try to convert the converted.) to be the decorations we'd see, but alas, I was wrong. The hall was smaller than any other prom I've attended, but it did eventually fill up nicely with people in the prom spirit. Thing is though that, while this was a nice time, this prom can't mean as much to me as the ones from high school. Those were more important not only because of my age at the time, but because they were such new and different experiences. The only time I'd worn a tux before my Junior Prom was for the wedding of my uncle Gary when I was...I dunno...3? To do it as a teenagers was more of an event than this was (and not just because the wife and I didn't head off to King's Island the next day.) As for the pictures they offered, well, the came out alright, but my head's too big for my body. Always has been. Even with the weight loss I look like Fatty Arbuckle. Granted, there's nothing the nice people taking the pictures could have done to fix my head, but the pictures themselves have changed. They were digital to start and were printed on the spot. They didn't cost $60 or $70 like the ones in high school (not that that's a bad thing), but they looked (quality-wise) like what we paid for them: 20 bucks. Too bright and they had a dumb border on them. The wife was very beautiful, so that's the only plus to the pix.

We got to the prom about a half an hour or so after it started. Of course there weren't many people dancing that early, but that might also have something to do with the music. In my younger days I enjoyed going to clubs and dancing. I don't know if I'm any good, but I enjoyed it all the same. I haven't been dancing in about 7 years or so and once the right music was played, I fell right back into it, but the music was a problem early on. When the wife decided it was time to shake it they were playing shit music. I have no idea how to nor desire to do any dancing to the Pussycat Dolls. I'm not a whore, I don't have clamydia and I don't own a stripper pole, so that was a bust for me (not that anyone at prom dancing to it would meet those characteristics, but the Pussycat Dolls sure do). The music/dancing situation started looking up for me when one of the two songs I was most surprised to hear started playing: "Da Butt" by EU. Fuck me! They played that at my Junior Prom! And the best thing about that then and now is that EU was never all that popular of a group, so for an Indianapolis event to play it just seemed odd, weird and fantastic. The music continued to get better (with a mis-step here and there) until it reached the pinnacle for me with the second most surprising song started playing: "Pussy Control" by The Artist Formerly Known As Prince (yes, I know he's Prince once more, but he wasn't on that album, so I'd use the moniker he used at the time, but it was symbol....oh, that Prince. What a trickster.) Overall the music was pretty good with a couple huge exceptions.

The prom was an event based around the radio station's morning drive-time guy. I've heard his show and while I hesitate to say it sucks, I will just say it's not my cup of water (tea blows!). He reminds me of high school DJs I've heard in town. He thinks/thought it's cool to talk over the music (about nothing of consequence), to talk about himself and to ask stupid questions of the prom goers (example: "has anyone here ever slept with a 17 year old? {stammerstammerbecauseitwasn'tfunny} I mean when you were in high school? Aha ha ha ha ha! Holy shit, you're a funny guy! Would you be my kid's Godfather?) Then there were the actual DJs for the event (who, I assumed, aren't radio staff since they worked for a DJ company) who thought it was the edge of coolness to take certain parts of songs and have them skip/repeat a couple of times ("W w w Wild Thing") so that it completely threw the whole groove of the song off. Nice job, douchebags! Hey, while you're at it, why dontcha play a couple more songs twice! Seriously, we were there for less than 3 hours and they played "September" by Earth, Wind & Fire and "Roni" by Bobby Brown (which, until just now, I always thought was called "Tenderoni") twice. Is there also a Payola problem in the prom/wedding DJ world?

In the end, it was a fun evening. My wife looked beautiful and I was a stud. Hell, I almost ended up Prom King (the guy who won was also named Tony). I tried not to let the couple of bad songs, craptactular wacky radio guy and lackluster decorations spoil my fun. And, I got to see two chicks totally making out on the dance floor. Lesbians! Ya gotta love 'em. Get a room, ladies!

Appeal to mystery author.

2007-03-13T12:59:00.000-04:00

Dear Sir,

When I met you recently I asked you how you dealt with your desire to be creative and you replied "therapy." You asked me if I was struggling with the same thing and I said that I was. I told you I'd recently quit my job and you were more happy for me than my own family was. You knew (and even said) that the job was killing my soul. I used to tell people that I died a little every time I went there. I cannot thank you enough for taking the time to respond to me beyond answering my silly question and I hope that, if you agree to an interview, you will allow me to help spread the news about you and your work.

Many thanks!

Am I still there?

2007-03-13T12:41:00.000-04:00

Things sure have been quiet around the old web site lately, huh? I wish I could say that things are just ever-so exciting that I haven't had a chance to post, but who am I kidding? I'm just boring.

I did put out call to interview one of my favorite authors, but that has yet to materialize. What's the phrase? "Keep hope alive!" I dunno. Maybe I should stick with "Why me?"

Motivation has always been a key component that I seem to only find in short spurts. I find that I can feel motivation very quickly -- I mean I'm talking about a fleeting instant of motivation and then it's gone. Strange thing is, I feel like I could do just about anything in those instances. My wildest dreams can come true and all the books I'd love to write can be written and my life will be so much better...in those instances. A second or two a couple times a year is all I seem to get. Sure, sometimes I can muster up a few minutes. I'll be able to think and write and get things done, but it never lasts. Maybe it's not motivation. Maybe it's fear.

They say that writers write because they don't know any other way. They have to do it. I think about writing all the time because I have to, but doing it takes something I fear I don't have: ability.

Oh, and for no good reason...here's a picture of me (about 50 lbs. ago) with the Publisher of DC Comics, Mr. Paul Levitz:

Feel free to Google around to find out who "Patty Jeres" is. She's keen!

More with the music? Can't you just write something?

2007-02-15T10:14:00.001-05:00

Tony's Book (Company) Review Corner

2007-01-22T16:41:00.000-05:00

Hard Case Crime Books.

Charles Ardai and Max Phillips saw the problem. A couple of years ago you could have stood in any bookstore in the country and seen the same problem. Among all of the flavor-of-the-moment best sellers, flash-in-the-pan self-help books and quickly aging boy wizards there was a big hole in your literary landscape. Where were the classic pulp novels that delighted the country from the 1930’s and 40’s through the 1960’s? These books created a world many people never saw: hard-boiled thugs, quick thinking gumshoes and tough dames that had mysteries aplenty; and many people today had never even seen the books themselves in over 50 years. Enter Ardai, Phillips and Hard Case Crime.

Pulp novels not seen in decades now had a new home at Hard Case Crime - and not only that, but new novels in the genre by today’s leading talents have also found a home at HCC. The publisher has taken on the task of bringing classic tales of crime and mystery by authors such as Erle Stanley Gardner, Wade Miller, Day Keene, David Dodge and Gil Brewer back to the marketplace alongside noted authors such as Max Allan Collins, Donald E. Westlake, Ed McBain, Stephen King and Pete Hamill. Every month sees a new or re-issued title from the great creators in crime fiction and every one of them is graced by some of the most amazing pulp-themed artwork you’re likely to see by a group of standout artists all inspired by the golden age of the pulp novels. Each book looks as good as it reads, and with the majority of the books ringing up at $6.99 you can be sure that while you’re getting knocked out by the stories, your wallet’s not taking a punch as well.

All images found over at www.hardcasecrime.com, so go check it out already!

Merry Christmas!

2006-12-23T23:41:00.000-05:00

My Christmas giving knows no bounds.

2006-12-20T15:08:00.000-05:00

More Christmas cheer from me to you. It's a tad long, but it's worth it...oh, and it's not what you think it is at first. Enjoy!

Tony's Christmas Wishes

2006-12-19T20:02:00.000-05:00

I'm sure most people have seen this by now, but in case you haven't, I now present you my new favorite Christmas song. Enjoy!

Tony's Book Review Corner

2006-12-03T18:23:00.000-05:00

White Christmas: The Story of an American Song

By Jody Rosen

It’s a song that plucks the deepest and most heartfelt feelings in all of us, and it’s a song that became the anthem of fighting men overseas and a nation at war. The song is White Christmas by Irving Berlin and in his book, White Christmas: The Story of an American Song author Jody Rosen recounts the elements involved in the song’s birth.

From Russia where Berlin was born to the streets of early 20^th century New York and the Tin Pan Alley song hucksters who made their living riding the latest gossip for inspiration, Rosen details Berlin as an insomniac gripped by a fever to create hits. Whereas his contemporaries (the Gershwins, Rodgers and Hart, Cole Porter) were looking for the muse with which to create art, Berlin felt he was only as good as his last big hit. After an already successful career of film and musical hits (not the least of which was God Bless America) Berlin created White Christmas as a novelty song, with its original first verse describing a Beverly Hills well-to-do pining for a Christmas “like the ones I used to know.” After World War II started, the song took on another life as the unofficial anthem of the war, hoisted into that lofty position not by radio, record companies or even Bing Crosby himself, but by G.I’s longing to reconnect with a place and a time that not only embodied home, but freedom as well.

Rosen has created a beautiful synthesis of musical, social and racial histories with this book in that he not only tells of the song’s creation, but sets this creation with a backdrop of the Depression and a world at war all the while detailing the changes in meaning for the song, the changes in American society and the correlation between a song drenched in Christmas spirit being written by an immigrant Jew. A song first of folly became an American legend that has brought generations back again and again to the simple Depression-era nostalgia for a life of easier times. Through war time and peace one little song either comforted the listener or became such anathema combining into glaring cruelty the commercialization of Christmas vs. the homespun feelings the song describes.

Be it fan of the song, the songwriter, the holiday or fan of musical history in general, you won’t go wrong in picking up this book.

My latest (in a string of very few) excitement.

2006-09-16T11:29:00.000-04:00

I recently commissioned a sketch by legendary comic book artist Gene Colan. He recently annoucned his retirement and he put the word out that he'd be doing a limited amount of commission over the next few months. I ponied up and put my money down. What I got back is beyond my wildest imagination. I asked for the character Nathaniel Dusk. This is what I received.

This is the original sketch by Gene. After that I had the option of having Dave Gutierrez do an inked version (as well as the possibility of doing a "fantasy cover") of the piece.

This is the inked version from Dave.

And this is the "fantasy cover" of a never-to-be-had issue of Nathaniel Dusk: Private Investigator. I gave absolutely no input on how the piece would turn out and it's too amazing for words. I did help Dave out by finding some images online of the logo for the book, but he took it from there and turned it into a masterpiece. AND...blue is my favorite freakin' color!!!

Words just don't express enough sometimes, you know?

Me (A year-by-year assessment), pt. 1

2006-08-17T16:42:00.000-04:00

I'm not important enough for a biography. I have done very little of note, so why waste a good book on me. I did think recently about writing down the memories I have just in case I suddenly go dumb(er than I already am). The easiest way for me to achieve this is to go year by year (mainly school years because that gives me a frame of reference) and just write.

I didn't go to an actual school for kindergarten. I went to a big place that when I first enrolled was called Singer Learning Center but later became known as ECLC (I have no idea what it meant). I went there during pre-school and kindergarten ages and I do believe that when you were of age, you did attend kindergarten at the Center, but I think it's main focus was daycare instead of school. I can't remember if I learned letters & numbers there or if I knew them already, but I do recall recesses we would have (a lot) and I can still see the place in my mind. I also have very vivid memories of getting my head split open, of being an M.C. for shows we would put on, of getting in trouble for not only repeating to a teacher some bad words I had heard a kid say, but for throwing food.

Apparently, I woke up one afternoon from our scheduled nap and decided I was going to chase a teacher around a counter. I liked this teacher (she was pretty and younger than most of the other teachers) and I would, for some dumb reason, refer to her as Miss Kitty (an obvious reference to Gunsmoke which I really don't remember watching as a kid). So, I wake up and I'm chasing her around a counter (a low, kiddie-like orange-colored counter (yeah, it was the 70s) with a sink, but it was a longish counter, so the chase was a good one) and I don't know if I had my shoe untied or what, but I fell and cracked my forehead open on a corner of the countertop. Of course, if this were to have happened today, my mom would have ended up owning the fucking place, but as it was in the mid-Seventies nothing really happened. I was bleeding badly and ended up going to the hospital for stitches. I remember the procedure mainly because I kept telling the nurses and whatnot that I had to pee. I still have a pretty prominent scar from the incident.

I don't know how I wound up becoming an M.C. for all school events, but I did. I wasn't overly extroverted as a kid, so how that happened is lost to time, but I was always the M.C. One time I wasn't and it was traumatic. I had to be in a skit we were doing about a frog or somesuch not having a tail (?) A polywog, I think it was. Anyway, I had to wear tights. I cried. I performed, but I wasn't happy about it at all.

Some kid was outside and he said, in this order, "motherfuckerdamnbitch". Me, being the upstanding guy you all know and love, decided to rat him out. I found the nearest teacher and told her exactly what I had heard. I got put against a wall for this (what...they couldn't find a corner?). The confusion was bad. I had done the right thing and was being punished for it. Apparently, as I learned later, I should have just told her he said a bad word, but not to repeat the bad word. Adults! How can a kid make heads nor tails?

More later.

Misc.

2006-08-17T16:30:00.000-04:00

I recently decided I no longer like The Doors. Nothing in particular sparked this revelation, I just thought about it one day and decided I don't like them. I was never a huge fan, but when the movie came out you couldn't go anywhere without hearing about them (even if you didn't want to know anything about them) - it goes so far as a guy I used to know could recite Morrison poems at will. That's not right.
This has to be stopped. I know people like to buy shit and put it under their Christmas tree...they do, it's a fact, but to go to an extreme such as this is just wrong.

This is being sold via QVC. I saw it during their Christmas in July broadcast. It, too, can be yours (with shipping) for about $120. They claim it's "Inspired by holiday tradition in the middle ages", but I think that's bullshit. It is pre-lit though, so if you're a lazy son-of-a-bitch and you have horrible taste, then this hunka shit is made for you. Be ashamed of yourself if you like this. Please. For humanity. Be ashamed.

Listening to...part 2

2006-07-30T19:11:00.000-04:00

I always liked this group, but never really got into them until around 1994. All those years I missed of this great sound.

What Was Tony Listening To? (Until I find something to write about)

2006-07-02T22:31:00.000-04:00

15 years ago. I was 19. It seems like yesterday and yet it seems like a completely different person.

My prior writings - part 4...the end already!

2006-06-17T01:18:00.000-04:00

My other web-only piece for Atomic (from 2003) turned out to be the last original piece done for the site before it was frozen in time. The magazine had gone away (a victim of politics and of 9/11 ) and while my piece was due to be the last page of the current issue, it didn't turn out that way. I did a last page for them in a previous issue on Bettie Page. It was her 80th birthday that year, so I wrote about that. By the way, you can still buy back issues of Atomic right here.

I wanted to do a longer piece on Bing and an interview I did with author Gary Giddins, but the piece ended up being what it is. I hope you like it. It's short, so you can get back to wasting you time in other areas of your life.

Remembering Bing Crosby
by Tony Adams

Contrary to popular opinion, this year marks the centennial of one of the greatest entertainers of all time: Bing Crosby. Although born on May 3rd, 1903, a year was shaved off his age early in his film career by his brother Everette (who actually thought he was shaving off two years) so that Bing might appear younger to movie-goers. Consequently, most reports list his date of birth as 1904. But ATOMIC has the inside scoop, and we are proud to pay tribute to this legendary performer’s 100th birthday while the mainstream media is playing catch up.

In an amazing career that spanned decades, Crosby’s legacy sadly has been reduced to two items of note: either people think about him only during the holidays for his timeless rendition of “White Christmas,” or they want to know if he really beat his kids. That gives short shrift to an artist who personified the American Everyman on hundreds of albums, as well as on the radio, in films, and on television.

Early in his career, Crosby broke new ground in popular music by bringing Jazz to the masses in his recordings as a Rhythm Boy with Paul Whiteman’s Orchestra and as a soloist. He later became the voice millions of Americans tuned into weekly on the radio during the height of the Depression, World War II and the post-war American high life. His future accomplishments as a performer are too numerous to mention, and he reached heights no other entertainer has achieved since. This short list — taken from Gary Giddins’ wonderful biography, Bing Crosby: A Pocketful of Dreams, The Early Years 1903-1940 — provides just a small taste of his monumental legacy:

He made more studio recordings than any other singer in history (about 400 more than Frank Sinatra)
Between 1927 and 1962, Crosby scored 368 charted records under his own name, plus 28 as vocalist with various bandleaders, for a total of 396. No one else has come close; compare Paul Whiteman (220), Frank Sinatra (209), Elvis Presley (149), Glenn Miller (129), Nat "King" Cole (118), Louis Armstrong (85), and the Beatles (68)
He financed and popularized the development of audio tape, revolutionizing the recording industry
He scored more number one hits than anyone in music history: 38 for Bing, as compared to 24 by the Beatles and 18 by Elvis Presley

All of this by a guy who was raised with a Jesuit education by a strict mother and a happy-go-lucky father.

A celebration of Bing’s birthday was held earlier in the year in his hometown of Spokane, WA, and there are plans for a shindig to be held in New York City. With the confusion surrounding his date of birth, the centennial celebration will likely last well over a year.

The extended tribute — like the man himself — will be a blessing to us all.

My prior writings - part 3

2006-06-17T01:09:00.000-04:00

Here the first piece I ever did for anyone. Leslie at Atomic Magazine (now retroradar.com) gave me my first shot and I can never thank her enough. It all started with my wife Dawn finding Atomic Magazine at the bookstore. It was a great magazine all about retro culture - and they even asked people if they wanted to write for them (I think it was on the website). I asked and told what my measley experience was and she gave me a shot. The piece didn't make it into the actual print magazine, but it was still important to me. I came up with the idea for the story because we knew someone in the group. I interviewed a few people and that was that. Trust me, I didn't do it for accolades or anything but no one from the group ever even said "thank you" - hell, no one even said if they'd read it and/or were happy with it. Oh, well.
(the original piece can be found here)

Naptown Stomp Swings Past the Hype
By Tony Adams

I've always been fascinated with swing and the culture that surrounds it. It may have started when I was a kid, watching old movies where people danced in ways that looked humanly impossible but were also cool as hell. Or it could have taken hold of me through my grandma's old albums by Nat "King" Cole and too many big bands to name. Who knows the actual point of impact on my soul? To put it plainly: I love the music. I love the dancing. I love the fashion.

I hated the hype.

In 1996, when Vaughn and Favreau were saying "baby" this and "money" that and big band music burst on the scene, the media latched onto the movement like a pack of hungry wolves. Although the rebirth of swing culture was a great thing indeed—with the Cherry Poppin' Daddies zoot-suiting it up on MTV and The Gap selling chinos to a jump blues beat—the media whirlwind left many swing fans with vertigo.

As with any pop culture movement, when the hype gets to be too much, you just have to step back, bide your time and reassure yourself that this too will pass. The media doesn't stay on anything too long. Like vending machine bubble gum—when the flavor's gone, you spit it out.

Naptown Stomp's Marketing Director, Quinton Snodgrass

Swing's Still the Thing
But here in Indianapolis, Kathy and Aaron Altschul had a different idea. Last February, they decided to start a swing dance club called Naptown Stomp. It wasn't the easiest undertaking, since by 2001 the attention swing had received just a few years before was gone. That wasn't an entirely bad thing, though. Not everyone likes gum.

The group's main focus wasn't the media trappings that turned up in ads or boring exposé pieces in weekly magazines. It wasn't about modern-day zoots or chompin' on stogies or jumping on the bandwagon. As group member Roland Walker puts it simply, "It's about the dancing."

Reaching Out to a Broader Audience
"Naptown Stomp was organized to teach and educate the general public on swing dancing, specifically Lindy Hop, swing music and its history," says the group's marketing director, Quinton Snodgrass. "We conduct a series of classes to introduce beginners to the dance as well as perform private shows for groups or clubs who are interested in adding some flare to their functions."

Although the members of Naptown Stomp are trying to keep swing going in Indy, once the heat of the "Swing Craze" died down, it became hard for folks who enjoyed the scene to find a place to do their thing.

"Money is the main issue," says Quinton. "Some clubs that jumped on the swing wagon during the '90s, when it was more of a fad, have really fallen by the wayside. It is tough to keep a swing venue in the black. Most of the dancers aren't big drinkers, so they go to the bar and order water. But most of the places that did swing figured out that they could make more money catering to the college crowd, who were less interested in dancing and more interested in the drink specials. I think this has pretty much happened across the country, and is one of the things that has made swing more of an underground phenomenon again."

The Naptown core consists of only five officers, with an additional group of indispensable volunteers. These are the "Swing Geeks" who go to weeklong workshops in Chicago or travel cross-country because they heard about a cool place to dance.

And it's that kind of spirit that gives me hope that something I cherish and admire so much won't be forgotten after the media's eye has turned to The Next Big Thing. Naptown Stomp is not going to give up. Swing music and dance are too important for these people, who continue to celebrate this enduring cultural movement.

To view the Naptown Stomp calendar of swing events in Indianapolis, visit www.naptownstomp.org/calendar.html.

Measure of a Woman

2006-05-19T14:20:00.000-04:00

When you're five you don't understand things. When I was five I didn't understand why she made me feel all funny and lite inside...I still get that same internal giggly rush of a feeling today.

Oh yeah!

2006-05-19T13:45:00.000-04:00

With all the crap on DVD nowadays...why can't a great Saturday tv show from my childhood be dug up? I don't need Punky or Facts of Life. I need Kidd!

The measure of a man

2006-04-29T10:13:00.000-04:00

When I was younger (and to a small extent still today) I never really felt like a man. A man was a grown up and a man could fix a car and he could play sports and he could get chicks whenever he wanted.

I'm not really any of those things that (can) make up a man. Let's examine:

1. I am 34 as of tomorrow and I still don't feel like a grown up. I never have. Sure, I have a job and I make money, but I don't really feel all that grown up. Maybe it's because I don't have any kids.

2. I can put gas in a car and I can, if needed, find the dipstick. I can replace washer fluid and I am obviously able to open the hood. And.......that's about it. I could find a carborat.....hell, I don't even know how to spell it. I can't do shit with a car other than drive the fucker.

3. I played sports as a kid and I cannot for the life of me figure out why I did it. First I played pee-wee baseball. We were old enough (or it wasn't around then) to not have to play tee ball, so the coach would pitch to us. I sucked. I played right field (which I came to learn as I got older is where they put people who suck). I played catcher once and with my glasses on under the mask I couldn't see shit.

Later on I played basketball. I even went to a basketball camp for two consecutive summers. Why? No fucking clue. I sucked at that game too. I would never try to actually get to the basket IF I was ever given the ball. Which was maybe twice in the 2 or 3 years I played at my park's local divison for boys.

Somewhere in there I was on a bowling team. At that very young age everyone sucks so I didn't feel like an outcast. That game was fun.

4. In my youth I was never able to get the ladies. Never. In high school I hung out with one girl my senior year. We had fun and drove around and stuff, but nothing ever happened. I never even kissed her. Years later I found out she was a lesbian. In my 20's I always held the notion that a true man could go into a bar or club, pick up a woman and have his way with her...and that this could and would happen whenever the guy felt like doing it. Isn't that what all the other guys around me were doing? What was wrong with me that I felt deficient in that area? Why couldn't I just pick someone and talk them into a fumbly liason?

Do all these things really make a man? Not really. Why did I feel so left out? No clue. Do I consider myself a man?

My prior writings - part 2

2006-04-12T00:31:00.000-04:00

This was also done for Nuvo. I had met Rob through my job and he's just a great guy. Plus, his comic strip is really funny. My editor at nuvo wasn't thrilled with the piece. He claimed to have had to do too much work to it for what is essentially a Q&A piece. I dunno. I'm happy with it (even though it's really a longer piece) and that's all I care about. It's all about me, you know.

Rob Harrell - On his way to the Big Top

By Tony Adams

It’s an exciting, yet bittersweet time for local cartoonist and fine artist Rob Harrell. The first collection of his hilarious comic strip, Big Top, is available in bookstores, joining the ranks of classics like Peanuts, Bloom County and The Far Side. Big Top has also recently been picked up for syndication in Philadelphia, Boston and Melbourne, Australia. That’s the exciting part. The bittersweet lies in the fact that his internationally syndicated comic strip isn’t even carried in his hometown paper, The Indianapolis Star.

The DePauw University and Ringling School of Art and Design in Sarasota, Fla., graduate started Big Top in 2001 and was picked up by Universal Press Syndicate in April of 2002. Ever since then the antics of 11-year-old Pete, Dusty the poodle, Wink the bear, Manfred the monkey and many more have made Big Top an anomaly among most of the other comics in the paper — Big Top is actually funny!

NUVO: Tell us about your artistic background.

Harrell: I started drawing cartoons when I was in fourth grade. I learned by drawing the characters from the comics ... Peanuts, Alley Oop, stuff like that. I drew cartoons for my middle school, high school and college newspapers and yearbooks. After art school, I let the cartoons idle for a while while I focused on the fine art and illustration until I got the idea for Big Top and got back to it.

NUVO: Who are your influences?

Harrell: My cartooning is really influenced by a lot of the big guys. Berkeley Breathed [Bloom County], Garry Trudeau [Doonesbury], Bill Watterson [Calvin & Hobbes] and I love Walt Kelly [Pogo]. As for fine art, I love John Singer Sargent, Lucien Freud and a couple of newer painters, Malcolm Liepke and Ann Gale.

NUVO: Why isn’t Big Top carried locally?

Harrell: I don’t really know other than there haven’t been many changes [at The Star] recently. The last change they made, I think, is when they picked up Baldo, James and Mr. Potato Head. Mr. Potato Head is already gone and they dropped James fairly quickly, but they kept Baldo, and that was probably three or four years ago.

I think it’s kind of a weird time for newspapers right now. They are reluctant to make any changes that might upset potential or existing subscribers. I understand the reasons why newspapers as a whole aren’t making changes, but in my fantasies I’d assumed that they would jump on it right away, but I’m going to keep bugging them.

NUVO: Is there room on the comics page for new material given that there’s so much space being taken up by older strips?

Harrell: Part of that is because so many comics pages have comics from retired and deceased cartoonists still taking up the space. And, please, don’t get me wrong, I still like Peanuts as much as anybody else. I think it’s brilliant, I think it’s hilarious, it’s a landmark, but there are new voices out there that need to be given room to grow. Essentially, I’m just trying to do a strip that I would want to read and one that I would find funny.

NUVO: Can you, as the creator, petition a paper to carry your strip?

Harrell: I’ve done some things where I have had people send in cards and stuff like that, and that might not do anything more than annoy them, frankly, but e-mails, phone calls or whatever from anybody who’s interested would be great … I think they get more feedback when they drop something than they ever do from someone when they want to see something new. But, you know there are a lot of good strips out there, not just Big Top, that I think should be getting more exposure. There’s a bunch of funny stuff out there that people are reading online, but those people don’t make as big a squawk about wanting to see that in their local newspaper as the people that would make a squawk when you pull out Prince Valiant. You do that and some people lose their minds over it. It almost feels like comic strips are like some people’s pets … you check in on them every day to see if they’re OK.

Harrell’s work can be viewed at www.robharrell.com or at www.ucomics.com, where you can have it sent daily to your e-mail. His new collection, Big Top, is available at local book stores.

My prior writings - part 1

2006-04-11T23:44:00.000-04:00

This is the first of the handful of writings I've done over the last few years. I wish I could find more places to write for, but I'm sometimes short on ideas and most places really like for you to have ideas when you come to the table.

Anyway, this is a second draft of this story. The first one appeared in Nuvo Newsweekly out of Indianapolis and can be found here. The intro to that story was weak, so I like this one better. Plus, this version (done for the fantastic retro-themed website retroradar.com) has a better intro that catered towards their retro theme. The title changed from Amazing to Spectacular to differentiate the two and because Spider-man has had books with both titles. It works, trust me.

The Spectacular Spider-Fan
By Tony Adams

The radical social and political changes of the 1960s are a familiar part of America’s historical landscape. Some of us lived through the era while others of us have studied it. Fundamental shifts were taking place in society: Trust turned to suspicion, homes were divided, and once well-known heroes became anachronisms. Something needed to change. People were looking for a new way of seeing things, a new sense of self and a new set of heroes. John Lennon. Martin Luther King, Jr. Spider-man.

It may seem blasphemous to include Spider-man in that list, but look at it this way: by the time of his creation, superheroes (whether real or imaginary) were in decline. Superman’s nigh-invulnerability seemed quaint. Batman’s then-current goofy adventures fighting creatures in outer space seemed out of place and out of character. Spider-man was just like your average kid—unsure of himself, unsure of his role in society and unsure of his future. For the first time in the history of comic books, Marvel Comics brought to the fore a collection of heroes with real-world problems. The Fantastic Four were a family changed by cosmic rays permeating their space ship. The Hulk was changed by man’s progress into the world of nuclear power, and Spider-man was changed by a radioactive spider bite. That may seem inconsequential when compared to space flight and nuclear energy, but for the readers who became enamored with Peter Parker’s adventures, he held within him a relatable factor that the others may have lacked. He could have been you! The power and the responsibility that came with his newfound abilities were daunting, but in the face of a changing world, Peter Parker became the hero it needed him to be—and we needed him as well.

Diehard comic collectors nurture this need, at times feeding it to excess. Of course, when it comes to collecting comics, there are many roads to follow. For example, some folks just buy what they like at the time. Sometimes the cover of the comic will attract the browsing reader. (It was a long-held belief in the comics publishing world that the cover was the main reason kids would buy the comic.) For others, it’s the collecting of a certain title that brings them back week after week and for many, having a complete run of a particular comic series is essential. It’s a pursuit to which they will happily devote countless hours, so that their collection will be as complete as possible…at least until the next issue comes out.

And then, there’s a collector of a different breed. Not content to just search out their favorite title, they carry the adventure one step further. Todd Adkins is one of those collectors, and he’s not alone. Todd’s mission takes him in search of Spider-man. Sure, he could just buy the titles in which Spidey appears—they’re easy enough to find, because they have the word “Spider-man” in the title. But then you have to take into account cross-over appearances. Sometimes, Spidey needs to help out in the pages of The Avengers or The Uncanny X-Men. Maybe Thor needs help today and Captain America could use a hand next week. All of these cameo appearances can be readily tracked down. With a popular character such as Spider-man, the suits at Marvel Comics make sure to put his name or picture somewhere on the cover, so you can’t miss him. But, collectors like Todd know that sometimes Spider-man will show up where he’s not formally (or legally) invited to be. And therein lies a new quest.

I recently had the opportunity to meet with Todd Adkins and pick his brain about his unique passion for the world’s most notorious web-slinger. He shared with me the story behind how he got started with his comic collection, and why he thinks Spider-man is tops among modern day superheroes:

RetroRadar: How did you get started collecting comics?
Todd Adkins: I think I talked my grandma into buying me one at Peachers Drug Store in Irvington (Indiana), when I was a kid. It was Swamp Thing #12, and from then on I was very much into monster comics, horror movies and [former local late-night horror movie host] Sammy Terry…things like that.

RR: When did Spider-man enter the picture?
Adkins: Probably not for a few years; the first few years I collected comics it was strictly the monster stuff. I probably came to Spider-man right around the time of Amazing Spider-man issue #100. So, it had been awhile. But, it was one of those immediate attraction kinds of things. Once I got hooked on reading Spider-man I got sucked in pretty hard. He quickly took the place of the monster books in terms of what my favorite comic was. It was a book I looked forward to every month.

RR: Is there anything you can pinpoint about Spider-man, in particular, that made him your favorite?
Adkins: I think it’s the same thing that made the movie popular and that was the human element. I identified with Peter Parker and he had a beautiful girlfriend, and I was at that age where I was starting to discover girls and I wanted a beautiful girlfriend, too. (laughs) But, I think it was the human element, the stories that revolved around Peter Parker and his world that I enjoyed, and still enjoy the most.

RR: How and when did your Spider-man appearance collection start?
Adkins: Gosh, it probably started about four years ago. I was collecting all of the monthly Spider-man titles and I kind of came up to the point where there were only a few scattered issues that I needed to complete those titles, and I felt like I didn’t want the collecting and hunting to be over. So, actually a friend of mine that I met on the Internet who collects Spider-man told me about how he had started collecting Spider-man appearances in other [non-Spider-man] books. I thought that sounded kinda fun, so that’s where that started. It was by his suggestion. He had all the monthly issues and I had all the monthly issues and it was almost like a little competition to see who could get the most obscure Spidey appearances.

RR: With so many appearances over the years in books other than his own, where did you start?
Adkins: My friend had a list and that helped a lot. From then it was just a matter of going through a lot of my own books and quickly scanning and pulling out the ones where he was on the cover. Some of them were pretty obvious, you know, if Spider-man’s on the cover, well, then that counts. Now it’s kind of this insane little thing, you know, collecting all these references to him. It didn’t get to that for a while. For a while it was just collecting all the major appearances where he was either on the cover or definitely a part of the story.

RR: What are your stipulations or qualifications for when something counts and when it doesn’t count as an appearance? I know that one of the appearances you found [in a non-Spider-man related book] was a Post-It® note with the name Peter Parker on it.
Adkins: Well, that’s what’s insane about it I guess. I count things that are definite references to Spider-man or Peter Parker, or one of the characters that are only a Spider-man related character. Like the Post-It notes. And again it’s a bit of a fine line. The Post-It note with Peter Parker’s name on it is about …

RR: That’s one on the edge?
Adkins: That’s pretty close to the edge. (laughs)

RR: What are some the stranger appearances of Spider-man you’ve found?
Adkins: There are a lot of them, but a small list would include things like in the Fantastic Four his likeness has shown up as the face on a dart board, an inflatable pool toy, a patch on a character’s jacket and on a coffee mug. In Excalibur there was a gorilla in a Spider-man costume and in Ghost Rider there’s a shot of a kid in a crowd holding a Spidey-head balloon. In Bill & Ted’s Excellent Comic Comic Book he’s seen swinging by in the background of one panel. It’s very tiny, but he’s there. He’s even shown up in an issue of the old romance comic Millie the Model. Parodies and spoofs count, too. Things like Spider-Ham, Spider-Caveman and Bug-Eye. They all count as appearances.

RR: What’s the most expensive item you’ve purchased?
Adkins: Amazing Fantasy #15. The first appearance of Spider-man.

RR: What’s the most expensive book you own? Is it still Amazing Fantasy #15?
Adkins: Value wise, yeah. There’s two ways to quantify value. One is what a price guide says it’s worth and another is what I could get for it on eBay, but it would still be Amazing Fantasy #15. There are some things I have that are really obscure that could start a bidding war on eBay and would give me, you know, a thousand times what it’s worth in any price guide.

RR: What is the most obscure item you have?
Adkins: It is Amazing Spider-man #184, but what makes it obscure is that the copy I found doesn’t have a cover price. Instead it has a large bright green sticker that says that it was a free giveaway with the purchase of All detergent and it’s one of those things that you’d probably say yeah that’s worth a couple bucks … maybe $10. But, if I were to put it on eBay right now I could easily get 500 bucks for it.

RR: What is the most sought-after book that you’re looking for now?
Adkins: It’s a book called Pow Biff Pops. It is a [comic] book that was done as a promotion for the opening of the Boston Pops in 1977. It was a black and white book, and they sold it in the lobby during intermission and after the performance. Then all copies that weren’t sold were destroyed. And it featured both Marvel and DC Comics superheroes. I’ve not seen one, I’ve only heard about it, but I’ve been in contact with the guy who did the layouts for it trying to talk him into selling me his personal copy. I thought I had it but he moved and it got lost in the boxes when he was moving. I’m still looking for that.

Spider-man is © Marvel Comics. Images courtesy of www.samcci.comics.org

Comic books and me

2006-04-11T17:28:00.000-04:00

I've been a fan and collector of comics for just shy of 20 years now and I think I'm reaching a crossroad.

You see, over time I have been less and less interested in buying the actual comic books themselves. Sure, I still do, but I prefer to have them in a trade paperback collection (or just plain paperback version for the uninitiated...although I am a sucker for a beautiful hardcover book). And let's face it, the publishers are focusing on trades more than ever now. Hell, you pick up a Marvel comic and you just know it'll be traded very soon. If it's a mini-series, they'll have the trade solicited a month after the mini ends...and sometimes for a cheaper price than what you'd have paid if you bought the individual comics. Outside of that, they can make more money on the trades in the long run so that's why you see so many story arch lasting just the right amount of issues to be traded nicely. i don't begrudge them this...it's business. I just don't know if I want to play along any more.

The problem is I now have many comics in comic form that I also have in a collected form which I enjoy and prefer so much more. Yeah, it's my fault that I bought the same thing in 2 different forms, but the comic itself is a habit and the trade is more desirable. I envy the Japanese in this respect: comics come out by the hundreds there every month and they're often hundreds of pages a piece compared with the US' measly 22 page comic/pamphlet every month. That's a tremendous difference that makes more sense to me the older I get.

I've been attempting to sell off some of the comics in favor of the trades, but that's a tough sell most of the time. You hardly ever get what you paid for them back and I understand this. I didn't get into the hobby to make a profit, but while burning off my inventory in favor of trades I can't afford to just give them away either.

Suggestions? Disagree with me? Let's hear it.

Who me?

2006-04-11T17:24:00.000-04:00

So, I've been trying to update this bad boy and it's working little by little. I have links now which I suggest you visit. I wouldn't put them up there if they sucked. Trust me! We're like family, me and you, so I wouldn't shit you or attempt to waste your time, although I might pick your pocket because you're such a bastard.

Describe the above (Top L to Bottom R)

2006-04-08T17:29:00.000-04:00

uh huh
ok
yeah
good
yeah
ok
right
great
puke

Something new?

2006-03-14T20:45:00.000-05:00

Well, to anyone who still checks this thing I have an announcement. I hope to soon work it so that all you'll have to do to get to this blog is to go to the domain name I own: boldavenger.com I never liked working that site, so I never did it. A blog seems so much easier for me to maintain, so that's what I hope to do.

More to come...I hope.

Truly, a record.

2005-11-29T01:00:00.000-05:00

My third post in one night (let alone one week/month) and what is there left to say except - I don't like going to sleep.

1. I have sleep apnea.
2. If I think about it too much I get nervous. I mean, it is like dying a little bit. It's just creepy in a way. You don't really control when you slip into sleep and I don't like not being in control of something like that. Yeah, sure, you control when you go to bed and you go to bed to go to sleep, but you can't control when you actually fall asleep. Doesn't that weird you out a little bit? How do you know you'll wake up? Ever? Again?

So, here I am at 1:05 a.m. on a work night because I don't want to go to sleep.

I'm 33 years old.

Just shoot me.

Hate?

2005-11-29T00:49:00.000-05:00

I really should hate Peter Billingsly. He plays Ralphie in the movie A Christmas Story. I should hate him because when I was a kid we kinda looked alike and people would call me Messy Marvin. I was not happy about that. You see, Peter starred in a series of commercials for Hershey's Chocolate Syrup and he played Messy Marvin - a kid who was messy with everything in his life except his chocolate milk. I should hate him for that, but I don't.

Gee...something I don't hate.

Check out Messy in all his glory

Well.....

2005-11-29T00:43:00.000-05:00

I never know what to write about. I guess that's why I don't do it. I should though. But why? Who cares? Who reads it? There's nothing to see here people! Don't just point at me and laugh. I have feelings too.

Don't I?

Am I cool or what?

2005-09-01T23:07:00.000-04:00

William Powell

You scored 11% Tough, 28% Roguish, 28% Friendly, and 33% Charming!

You are the classic rogue, a stylish rake with the devil of a wit and a
flair for mischief, and you shake your martinis to waltz time. You are
charming and debonair, but slightly untrustworthy, and women should be
on their guard. If married, you are simply a bit of a flirt, even if
it's just with your own wife...but if you're single, watch out. You
usually rein yourself in to concentrate on one lovely beauty at a time,
but with you, we never know. You're an inviting partner, but there's a
playful devil behind your eyes, and those trying to get close to you
should know they're playing with fire. You're stylish and fun, but you
follow your own course, which may or may not include a steady gal.
Co-stars include Myrna Loy and Carole Lombard, classy ladies with an
adventurous streak.

Find out what kind of classic dame you'd make by taking the
Classic Dames Test.

My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:

You scored higher than 12% on Tough
You scored higher than 80% on Roguish
You scored higher than 52% on Friendly
You scored higher than 58% on Charming

Link: The Classic Leading Man Test written by gidgetgoes on Ok Cupid

So, I took this test and they say I'm classically cool. Are they silly or what?

What?

2005-07-30T00:05:00.000-04:00

I know I don't post as much as I could, but it's pretty sad when my own dog has started a blog and is actually doing more with it than I do with mine. stubbythepasha.blogspot.com

What the hell?

I hate to use this word, but...

2005-07-26T01:51:00.000-04:00

There is no other word that packs the punch this one does. These people go too far beyond assholes. I say this not to be sexual, but to state a true fact. The following people are cunts: Ann Coulter, Tucker Carlson, Billy Bush, Nancy Grace and Ryan Seacrest.

What to do with my life?

2005-07-01T18:29:00.000-04:00

Be a surfer? Can't really swim.
Be a lifeguard? See above.
Be a teacher? Don't know shit about shit.
Be a priest? I like the theatricality of it and I think I could instill people with the Holy Ghost, but I don't like religions enough to bother.
Be a pimp? Too much work for ungrateful hoes.
Be a clown? Too much makeup and too many children.
Be a singer? Can't sing well enough.
Be an actor? I'd love too. Tell me more!
Be a writer? I never update this thing, how could I be expected to do for pay what I won't do for free? No wait, that's what money does - it inspires!
Be a dancer? Too fat and too old.
Be a paramedic? Too much blood and guts.
Be a game show host? Ryan Seacrest is a cunt! Bob Barber is the shit though.
Be Billy Idol? One is more than enough.
Be a panhandler? Too much working outdoors. Plus, the uniform is smelly.
Be a doctor? Too dumb (also, see Be a paramedic?)
Be a web designer? Too dumb and too lazy to learn how.
Be a sideshow barker? (see Be a priest?)

Just be? What a pussy denouement?

What the fuck?

2005-04-29T01:51:00.000-04:00

So, the wife is playing around on iTunes the other day and smack dab on the front page is a listing for some new exclusive track by some poofter fucking electronica band called Manhead who DARES to remake one of the greatest rock songs of my lifetime. I wish to God that the band they DID NOT do justice by with the remake would rise up from their ashes and kill these fuckers. What's the song, you say?

Now, I have always felt that there were groups in the 80's that only I had ever either liked or had ever heard of because no one ever talks about them (Mary's Danish - my favorite band for years and years, The Front, King Swamp, etc.) but the song in question is - BIRTH, SCHOOL, WORK, DEATH by the motherfucking group THE GODFATHERS! Bow down, bitches to this ripfuckinrocking group. Their album by the same name is awesome. It has some of the best lyrics I have ever heard. Imagine this -- you're into this song "Tell Me Why" about love gone wrong -- it's rocking -- and then the tempo slows to a crawl and it's takes it's time while the lead singer sings:

"Yeah...I told her I loved her very much. I told her I loved her more than life itself. And I told her...I told her I loved her more than I love myself (and then the music kicks back in as he snarls) -- That's saying something"

Fuck!

Here's what's in a name

2005-04-18T11:29:00.000-04:00

I have picked a new name for my iPod. At first I called it Suck Head, but I rethought that decision. Whose head would have been sucked? Or is it I who was a suck head?

It is now called Pizza Pussy Santa. I got the name from comedian Dave Atell of Comedy Central's show Insomniac - it's a bit from his comedy album Skanks For The Memories wherein he says that that's what he would name his kid because everyone likes at least one of those things...and I do. More than one actually, but I'm not saying which.

What's in a name?

2005-04-12T17:52:00.000-04:00

So, what should you name your iPod anyway? When prompted back in January, I named mine the ever-original: Tony. I racked my brain trying to find something clever, but who would care? I could have called it iTony, but of course I Tony...who else would I be? I'd like to be other people, but I'm not.

I Tony.

More hate.

2005-04-01T12:01:00.000-05:00

I need more hate (or so I've been told), but I have plenty. Should I really spread it around? It's not like jelly needing to be spread on bread. It's more like...chicken pox or measels. No one really wants it, but it's something you sometimes have to deal with. I never had measels. Fuck measels! <--- There's your hate! I got hate for ya!

Radio sucks.
Fox News sucks.
The Apprentice sucks.

Garden State does not suck.
Henry Rollins does not suck.
I do not suck.

yes I do.

What to say now?

2005-03-08T23:50:00.000-05:00

So, it appears I'm making a go at this web log thing. I don't like the word blog, but I don't know what else to call it. How about we call it "Stymie" I always liked him and his derby hat. He had the funniest line one time. While peeling and peeling into an artichoke he exclaimed "It mighta choked Artie, but it ain't gonna choke Stymie." Priceless.

Back to hate.

I don't understand why The Pretenders are being enducted in the Rock n Roll Hall of Fame. I hate them. You'd never find them on my iPod.

I love my iPod. I got it for Christmas and it's taking so long to get all of the stuff I want on it. I have over 3000 songs so far and I'm only up to the D's in my cd collection. I wish I knew more about iPod culture. Not to join up, mind you. Just to be nosy.

I also hate Creed. I'm glad they're dead. And I hate(d) Hootie and it's fucking funny that Hootie is now shilling for Burger King dressed as a fag cowboy. I say fag under consent from my gay friends. I'd say it's a good thing he's been reduced to that, but he's making money, so that sucks. Back to Creed. Check out the hidden track on the latest David Cross comedy cd for a bit about David meeting the singer of that shit band.

I love comic books. More on that later.

BTW, who besides two people I know of are reading this?

Post to the Third power of hate!

2005-03-03T17:37:00.000-05:00

I hate Usher, Lil Jon, 50 Cent and, oh, about a hundred more shitty musical acts right now. What has happened to the world that this is what we call entertainment? And don't think me racist by the ones named above. Just as shitty are Bon Jovi (still!), Nickleback, 3 Doors Down, Slipnot and others awash in being white boys.

I also hate (as it seems to be so hip to do so lately) being thought of as gay because I like(d) The Cure and The Smiths. They got me through high school and my early twenties and I've never had a dick in my mouth or ass. I've never understood how the music you like can correlate into taking one in the shitter.

I hate the song American Pie too. I made a list one time of all the songs I could go the rest of my life not EVER hearing again, and that piece of shit pie was number one. Followed by Losing My Religion and ANY and EVER Beach Boys song. Yeah, yeah, Brian Wilson is a crazy genius. Ok. I don't live near the fucking ocean and could fucking care less about surfing. Fuck them!

Post the first

2004-09-22T02:44:00.000-04:00

I'm up right now because my damn bowels were keeping me up. I hate having G.I. problems. I would wish these problems on enemies, but not on anyone else. I don't think I have any enemies though. I might have some, but they're very stealth about their hatred towards me.

What is your favorite Christmas movie?
	Holiday Inn
	White Christmas
	A Christmas Story
	The Bells Of St. Mary
	Die Hard
	Lethal Weapon
	National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation
	It's A Wonderful Life
	Elf
	Miracle on 34th St.

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